I do not wish my name, or even initials to be used, as the ones I escaped are far-reaching and "powerful" in earthly ways, and I should not fear them, but I have suffered and am now suffering as a result of a time of believing what they were selling,and do not wish to attract their attention again.I was adopted and raised by one God-hating man, and a nominal Christian woman. I was sent to a church as a custom of "normal" behavior. There, the Bible was used as a reference Book that had little or nothing to do with "now". I thought, even as a child, that it did, and I wanted to know. I began a search for someone, anyone, who could tell me Who God was, and what He wanted me to do. I read the Bible, and while there seemed to be something there that I knew I needed, I couldn't figure out what it was, or how to go about it. I don't know if that is the way to express it or not. It was not a feeling,per se, it was like a hunger for something that I didn't know how to ask for, because I didn't know what it was.I had a Catholic friend, and went to Mass with her one day. They seemed to have more of an awe and reverence for God. Was He there? Years later, I married a Catholic, and had to join their church in order that my children could be "baptized", (as babies? isn't it supposed to be a choice that you make after hearing the Gospel?). I loved my children, and certainly did not want to stand in their way of being saved.My marriage was ended by my husband's affair with another woman, the same woman who was also having an affair with the priest at our "church". I had been playing guitar for a "charismatic" prayer group that had formed there. When I went to the priest asking his counsel (having discovered my husband's affair), he told me to leave town, and never come to "his" church again.The leader of the group then called me and told me to never show up at their meetings again, as well.I took this as a "brush-off" from God, and kept my distance for a while, but the hunger just would not leave. I saw a local program on television, and there were "Christians", singing, and lifting their arms in worship, and they looked as though they had what I had wanted all my life.I began going there regularly. Everyone there seemed to be rich, and I felt ashamed. I worked in a discount store, and was barely able to pay my bills and take care of my children. I noticed that out of 500 members, only two showed up for a "work day", that was announced the previous Sunday, myself, and one other person. That got the pastors' attention, and soon I was doing all the jobs no one else wanted to do, including assisting the pastor's wife when she made her TV programs, cleaning the church and their school, just about any thing that needed to be done. Their "services" were typical of what you have described. Music, "supernatural" manifestations, and lots and lots of money.One of their favorite verses was the one about the workman being worthy of his hire.I inherited quite a large sum of money when my adopted mother died, and, yes, I gave 10%, and so very, very much more. After years, yeah, it took a long time, I began to see that "prophetic" words didn't seem to give glory to God, only money and service to the pastors. When I started to ask them serious questions about the Bible, they got a "word" that I was supposed to go to another state to acquire a skill that was needed. I won't mention what that skill was, as I do not wish to be recognized. Call me a wuss if you want. While there, I seemed to wake up. I havent' been back there. Yes, they told me that I was now "lost".I am old now,and as all my money is now theirs, I am working quite hard to "make ends meet".I am finding the hunger is still with me.That's why I was reading your site.
