(husband and wife come walking up aisle)
HUSBAND:
(at the front) Here, let me get the door for you!
WIFE:
Well thank you!
HUSBAND:
No problem. Oh, here, let me get us some chairs... (gets some chairs from front and sets them on stage)
WIFE:
Well thank you very much!
HUSBAND:
No problem.
WIFE:
(coughs) Boy, my throat is so dry, with all this heat...
HUSBAND:
Here, why don't you let me get you some water... (starts to rise)
WIFE:
(thinking) WAIT! (grabs his arm and forces him to sit down) What do you WANT?
HUSBAND:
What's THAT supposed to mean?
WIFE:
Well, why in the world are you being so NICE to me? You've opened about three doors for me today, got the chairs, and now you're ready to head out after a cup of water...?
HUSBAND:
Oh well. You got me. I'm after your money!
WIFE:
Now come, why so nice?
HUSBAND:
Sweetheart. Don't I ALWAYS do these kinds of things for you?
WIFE:
(thinks a moment) Well, yes...
HUSBAND:
Duh. It's because I hate you so, so, so very much!
WIFE:
(laughs) So it's because you love me?
HUSBAND:
Sure.
WIFE:
And you don't mind doing all these little things for me?
HUSBAND:
No, actually I LOVE to do little things for you. Just don't ask me to do anything BIG. (they laugh) But think of all the things you do for me . . . I mean, you IRON for me, you do all the cooking, you clean the kitchen and the bathroom . . . do you do anything else...?
WIFE:
(is shocked, and smacks him) You KNOW I do just about EVERYthing else! I make ALL the phone calls...
HUSBAND:
...well, that's just because I'm a tongue-tied introvert idiot...
WIFE:
I make the bed in the morning, straighten up the house every night --
HUSBAND:
And do you MIND doing all those things?
WIFE:
Okay, I get your point. I do all those things because I love you so much.
HUSBAND:
And just think, when we do little things for each other -- WITHOUT COMPLAINING -- it just opens the way for us to love each other even more!
WIFE:
Oh! Well, in that case. Let ME get the chairs!
HUSBAND:
No way. I love you more, I SHOULD GET THE CHAIRS...
(they tussle over the chairs for a moment, then each take a chair, smiling)
WIFE:
Well since I love you more than you love me, I SHOULD GET THE DOOR!
HUSBAND:
No way. That's still MY job!
(they tussle over the door, laughing, attempting to shoulder each other aside)
WIFE:
I'll swap ya, opening doors for doing the dishes...!
HUSBAND:
(horrified) Are you serious? I'm not sure if I love you THAT much!
WIFE:
(laughing) Ooh! (smacks him) But I'll let you get the door, I kind of like it, ya big Lug.
HUSBAND:
(coughing) And I kind of like you doing the dishes... (exiting, slowly, playfully)
WIFE:
(sweetly bickering) Well, it just proves that I REALLY DO love you more! The dirtier the job, the greater the love!
HUSBAND:
Well I clean up after Mongo -- now THAT's a DIRTY job!
(they go out lightheartedly arguing who loves the most)
__________________________________________
Completely free Christian scripts, sketches, mimes.
Always a parable. Storytelling making the difference.
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