(Techie with laptop, very excited, adoring her new “Worship PC” — a PC Specialist is working on equipment nearby)
TECHIE:
Oh I’m so excited! I’ve always wanted one of these Worship PCs. All my friends are using them, and they’re so happy! Wow! This is going to just change my life! WELL! Let’s get started!
(begins typing, clicking merrily away, smiles slowly disappears — it’s just not as good as she thought it would be, in fact, it doesn’t seem to be working at all!)
Great. It looks like I musta got a BUSTED Worship PC. This stupid thing! (begins hitting keys harder and harder) Now what’s THIS?! Password?! Nobody said anything about a password! What a nightmare! How am I supposed to know the password!?
PC SPECIALIST:
(notices the Techie’s distress) Hey, can I help you with anything?
TECHIE:
(lifts a hand in a STOP gesture) I CAN HANDLE THIS!
PC SPECIALIST:
Okay-okay. Have it your way. But if you need anything, just give me a scream and I’ll be glad to help you through your problems…
TECHIE:
(angrily) I’m not having any problems. (returns to computer)
(takes a deep breath, closes eyes, visibly calms herself — opens eyes, calmly smiles at PC, then erupts like a volcano) I HATE THESE STUPID COMPUTERS! THEY NEVER WORK LIKE THEY’RE SUPPOSED TO. (bangs on keys exaggeratedly, stands up and threatens to hurl computer into congregation)
PC SPECIALIST:
(watching with growing horror) Hey wait! Hey! Hey! Stop! STOP! (rushes between Techie and congregation)
TECHIE:
But the dumb thing is worthless! I wanted to worship on this high-tech Worship PC, and I can’t even get past the stinking password!
PC SPECIALIST:
(very calm and calming) Well here, sit down. We’ll see if we can’t get this PC up and running… Okay, so tell me. When did you have your software installed?
TECHIE:
Software?
PC SPECIALIST:
Your Baptism Software. Haven’t you had it installed on your PC?
TECHIE:
BAPTISM Software! What in the world! I’ve never heard of anything so crazy!
PC SPECIALIST:
Oh well, see, that’s part of your problem. You gotta get this Baptism Software installed on your PC, otherwise it’s just a plain old piece of hardware. (pulls out a shiny CD and shows it to Techie) If I put this on your system, it’ll never be the same.
TECHIE:
Wow. Really? Um, like, so how much extra is this going to cost me?
PC SPECIALIST:
Well that’s part of the Good News! It’s absolutely FREE! If you want it, it’s yours, I can install it right now.
TECHIE:
You’re not yanking my chain? What's the hidden cost? How much you gonna charge for labor?
PC SPECIALIST:
I’m not even pulling your leg. No hidden cost. It's free -- I'm not going to ask for your credit card numbers or a love gift of $29.95.
TECHIE:
Well, if it’s not some kind of trick, or if there’s no fine print, sure, if you can install it for me, please do!
PC SPECIALIST:
(bends down) We just insert the CD here — you sure you want this software?
TECHIE:
(very excited) Yes! YES!
PC SPECIALIST:
(inserts CD) Okay. Why don’t you hit F9?
TECHIE:
Okay. (hits F9) Oh no! What’s going on! It’s deleting files!
PC SPECIALIST:
Don’t worry about it. It’s just cleaning out your temporary files — files completely redundant and some of them are quite harmful. You’ll be surprised how much better your system runs when it’s running at optimal level.
TECHIE:
So what’s the Baptism Software doing, exactly?
PC SPECIALIST:
First deleting all the negative stuff from your drive, making more room, and now look — it’s installing the new software. Now you’ve got the Special Power Installation Renewal and Illumination Transfer.
TECHIE:
Special Power Installation Renewal and Illumination Transfer?
PC SPECIALIST:
You can call it “SPIRIT” for short.
TECHIE:
Great. So now I’ve got SPIRIT.
PC SPECIALIST:
The Master Programmer has given you a special piece of Himself, right now (tapping PC) right here. And this code will lead you to Him. And note, you're not DOING anything, are you?
TECHIE:
Huh? No, it's all a part of the installation, right? Great. So now I can worship Him?
PC SPECIALIST:
That right. Now, for the first time, with this software, you can talk directly to Him. Your SPIRIT system will lead you into all truth.
TECHIE:
(staring into PC) I can’t believe it! It’s actually working now!
PC SPECIALIST:
I think you’ve got it. (beginning to exit)
TECHIE:
(very happy, but then suddenly jumps, looks close at screen) Oh great. Hold on a second here. It’s asking for a Password again.
PC SPECIALIST:
(turns back) This is the time to let your SPIRIT System kick in and lead you to where you ultimately need to go…
TECHIE:
(thinking a moment, then closes eyes and prays — opens eyes, and then speaks out loud as she types each letter)
Okay: J – E – S – U – S!
PC SPECIALIST:
I think you just found the Worship Chat Room!
TECHIE:
(wiggling fingers, raring to go) And NOW I’m going to do me some WORSHIPPING! In Spirit AND Truth!
__________________________________________
Completely free Christian scripts, sketches, mimes.
Always a parable. Storytelling making the difference.
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