Note: The Greek word for “Wisdom” is “Sophia.”
(a mob of fans [5 to 10 people] wait at a barrier — a red ribbon strung across the front of the stage — with cameras and pads of paper for autographs, excited and giggling, some jumping up and down, all of them looking toward the back of the room with anticipation for the arrival of the famous movie star Sophia)
ULTIMATE FAN:
(holding camera) I’m going to get a picture AND an autograph!
FAN #1:
Is that her?
(all fans scream with excitement)
ULTIMATE FAN:
THAT’S NOT HER! That’s just a pizza delivery girl!
FAN #2:
I just LOVE Sophia! She’s just the greatest movie star of ALL time!
(all fans chitter and chatter, giggling and jumping up and down, standing on tippy-toes, staring with anticipation toward the back of the room)
MOB OF FANS:
(sample chatter) She’s so beautiful! I love her! When is she coming? I can’t stand the excitement! This is soooooo exciting! Oooooh! I’m going to faint!
FAN #1:
Is that her?
(all fans scream with excitement, a few take flash photos)
ULTIMATE FAN:
THAT’S NOT HER! That’s just a lady taxi driver!
(all fans return to chittering and chattering, even more excited than before)
SMARMY MEDIA GUY:
(approaching) Ladies and Gentlemen: Attention! Ladies and Gentlemen! (the hubbub of the crowd dies down) I’m from the studio of Ms. Sophia! (crowd cheers, applauds) As a special treat to you fans, the studio is making a very special promotional offer today…
CROWD:
(crowd begans to get too excited, cheering and screaming, then start chanting) So-PHEE-AH! So-PHEE-AH! So-PHEE-AH! So-PHEE-AH! So-PHEE-AH!
SMARMY MEDIA GUY:
(holding up hands to get their attention) Ladies and Gentlemen! Ladies and Gentlemen! (they finally calm down enough to listen) You haven’t even heard what the offer IS yet! For ANY of you fans who’d like Ms. Sophia to come over to their house, you just have to ask her over! (fans gasp) But you have to really mean it!
(Ultimate Fan faints, dramatically, theatrically, putting the back of her wrist to her forehead, and then expiring to the side, right into the arms of Fan #1 — the crowd and the Smarmy Media Guy ignore the display)
CROWD:
So-PHEE-AHHH! So-PHEE-AHHH! So-PHEE-AHHH! So-PHEE-AHHH!
SMARMY MEDIA GUY:
(trying to get a word in) This is because we love you fans — excuse me? Ladies and Gentlemen! Ladies and Gentlemen! (finally, waves his hands in frustration, then waves his hand to say I give up on you unruly bunch of fanatics, and exits)
SOPHIA:
(finally appears, crowd screams wildly when they see her approaching — she wears a typical 1940s Hollywood Movie Starlet costume, with scarf on head, dark sunglasses, a fur on her shoulders — she comes floating up the aisle, the perfect picture of confidence, soaking in the adoration — she smiles and waves to her “fans” in the audience, even pausing to chit-chat with a few of her adoring “fans”) So good to see you here! Oh, so glad you could make it! Aren’t you the president of my fan club? (even signs autographs!)
CROWD:
(begins screaming when they see her — those without cameras begin jumping up and down, pointing and laughing and those WITH cameras begin to snap off pictures [purchase 3 or 4 disposable cameras with FLASH, make sure the flashes are going on, if someone can produce a flash gun, that would help] — Ultimate Fan miraculously revives in the arms of Fan #1 — the longer Sophia detains her arrival, the more excited everyone gets)
SOPHIA:
(finally approaching mob, starts signing autographs) I love you all! I love ALL of you!
CROWD:
We love you! We love you! Oh you’re wonderful! I love you so much! WE LOVE YOU!
SOPHIA:
Is there anybody here who would like me to come to their home today?
CROWD:
Me! Me! Come to MY house! I’m your ultimate fan! Please come to MY house! YES!
SOPHIA:
(approaches Fan #1) How about you? May I come to your house, today?
FAN #1:
YES! Oh I’m so happy! Yes — WAIT! (looking to back of room) Isn’t that Brad Pitt? I LOVE Brad Pitt! (races away to get Mr. Pitt’s autograph, and about 2 or 3 others in the crowd exit with Fan #1)
SOPHIA:
(to Fan #2) How about you? Would you like me to come to your house today?
FAN #2:
(smile fades somewhat) Uh, well, um, yeah, I guess so. You see, I have to go clean my place. And I should get the carpet replaced, too… (turns slowly and walks away, and 2 or 3 of the crowd follow)
ULTIMATE FAN:
Sophia! Ms. Sophia! I’d love it if you came to MY house today… Please?
SOPHIA:
Do you really want me to come to your house? Isn’t there another movie star coming along today that you’d rather see?
ULTIMATE FAN:
I came here to see YOU, Ms. Sophia! Please come to my house today.
SOPHIA:
You aren’t worried that your places is a — PIG sty?
ULTIMATE FAN:
I don’t care! I just want you to spend time with me! PLEASE!
SOPHIA:
Then I’d LOVE to come to your house. In fact, if you’d like me to, I’ll live at your house…
ULTIMATE FAN:
Ooooh! This is sooooo exciting! Let’s go! Let’s go!
REMAINDER OF CROWD:
Who’s coming next? Isn’t Britney supposed to be here today? When’s Angelina Jolie supposed to get here? Ooooh! I LOVE Angelina! (they slowly disperse)
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Completely free Christian scripts, sketches, mimes.
Always a parable. Storytelling making the difference.
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